Saturday, 07/29/06
Dear Maria Cantwell,
I think you've been a pretty marginal Senator, and a disappointment more often than not on the Judiciary committee, but this is not the year to be electing any more Republicans, so I'm going to vote for you. However, your opponent is shaping up to be one clever bastard, so I'm a little concerned that not enough other Washingtonians share my intentions. Six years ago you won by about 2000 votes, as I'm sure you recall, and as anyone who watches the Mariners on TV can attest, your advertising sucks. The spot in heavy rotation, "First", opens with this weak whimper of a line:
One thing we can count on with Senator Maria Cantwell [long pause], she puts us first.
Lousy grammar aside, that line makes you sound like you're campaigning while under indictment. "That Maria Cantwell, she may have to wear an electronic ankle bracelet, but one thing we can count on is...". James Traficant is wondering why he didn't come up with spin like that. Except your felony record is clear, so knock it off.
Your constituent,
Nat Irons
06:26PM «
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